October 01, 2008
2008 Fall Television Season Highlights: Life
by Rajan Khanna
Of last year's crop of new television shows, my favorite would have to be NBC's Life. I knew very little about the show before watching except that it starred Damian Lewis, someone whose work I appreciated as Major Winters in HBO's Band of Brothers. That was enough to get me watching. What I found was enough to keep me there.
Lewis plays Charlie Crews, a police officer who went to jail for 12 years (of a life sentence) for a murder that he didn't commit. DNA evidence ultimately won his release and the resulting lawsuit set him up with a massive bank account and reinstatement of his detective's badge.
Prison has had its effect on Crews, breaking him in many ways, but also giving him a unique perspective that usually is brought to bear to help solve the cases that he investigates from week to week. Aiding him is his partner, Dani Reese, played by Sara Shahi. During the first season, Reese was saddled with Crews as a punishment, and generally regarded him with suspicion. But in the course of their partnership, they have come to respect and rely on each other. By the opening of the second season, they seem to have settled into a familiar relationship.
All except for the secrets.
Because Crews has been on a quest to clear his name and uncover the conspiracy that led to his imprisonment in the first place. A conspiracy that has fingers deep in the police department itself. One of the key figures identified in the first season, a prime author of the conspiracy, was Dani's father, Jack Reese. This is a buried mine in the relationship between the partners that threatens to one day blow up.
Like many shows these days, Life deals with a crime every week while also advancing the uber-plot of Crews investigating the conspiracy. This looks like it will continue this season, though already they have taken leaps with this – the real murderer, for example, is in jail. Now, another key figure in the original crime, the young daughter of the murdered family, has been found. How she will figure into the story remains to be seen.
The shining part of the series, however, for me is Crews' quirkiness. He has a fondness for fruit, for example, and usually has a piece close at hand. We're told in the first season this is because it's something you can't get in prison. He also studies Zen and Eastern philosophy, uttering phrases about the connectedness of everything at the drop of a hat. Like the main character of “The Mentalist”, his brokenness, the fact the he seems to run on a track askew from everyone else, makes him somehow likable. It's the twin punch of having a childlike openness, and an underlying darkness. The sweet and sour of the dramatic world. It's a powerful combination.
Life is another cop show, yes, but it's a cop show that has character and charisma and I hope that it succeeds.
Life airs on NBC on Friday evenings.
Posted by Rajan at 02:10 PM
September 29, 2008
2008 Fall Television Season Highlights: Knight Rider
by Rajan Khanna
After watching the craptacular mess that was the Knight Rider television movie earlier this year, I found myself wondering exactly why I was planning to watch the first episode of the ongoing television series. Was I really that interested in new content for the site? Did I really want to go beyond series I found interesting?
Apparently, the answer is yes.
Five minutes into the premiere of the Knight Rider series, I questioned that decision. The production values of this show seemed less than network. I wondered if maybe most of the budget was spent on special effects and Val Kilmer's salary (Kilmer is the voice of KITT in the new version). And the lead, Mike Traceur (Justin Bruening) has the charisma of a head of lettuce. But what almost completely destroyed my tenacity was the part where KITT, normally a Ford Mustang, transforms into a pick-up truck, seemingly generating new parts and mass through an orgiastic display of computer animation. I had the remote in my hands, my finger poised over the stop button.
In the end, however, I let it play. Sometimes we all like to watch train wrecks.
Knight Rider, an update of the 80s series, is about a guy and a car. Really. There's a lot more thrown in, but it basically comes down to that. For this series, the guy and the car in question work for a government agency. It's all very 24 with a team of analysts and agents who offer support to the guy and the car in a high-tech secret headquarters complete with lots of computer screens and computer simulations that can be manipulated with the flip of a hand.
The emphasis here is on action with fistfights and car chases and, in the pilot episode, a missile attack which results in a flaming high-speed car. The stakes in all of this action tend to get lost with vague references to packages and data. But there are plenty of dramatic expressions and dialogue to emphasize that it is important.
Additionally, this episode also introduces an element for Mike Tracer, namely the ever so rarely used mysterious past. It seems that Mike doesn't remember large parts of his military past and that proves to be fodder for a subplot that will likely stretch at least this whole season.
Sadly, I will never discover the nature of that past because frankly, one episode is all I could take. If, however, you like big explosions and flashy effects and don't really care about logical plots, character motivations or believable and likable characters, Knight Rider should be exactly what you want.
Knight Rider airs Wednesday nights on NBC.
Posted by Rajan at 08:52 PM
September 25, 2008
2008 Fall Television Season Highlights: Heroes
Posted by Rajan at 12:47 PM
September 24, 2008
2008 Fall Television Season Highlights: The Sarah Connor Chronicles
by Rajan Khanna
Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles premiered last year on Fox when there wasn't much else on television that was new. Having its origin in the Terminator movies, I decided to give it a shot. What I discovered was much better than I expected from the concept, though not necessarily what I wanted.
The Sarah Connor Chronicles picks up where Terminator 2 left off (wisely, in my opinion, ignoring the third movie installment). Once again Terminators are sent back to kill John Connor, once again a co-opted Terminator model is sent back to save him. Only this time the savior Terminator has the appearance of a young girl. What follows is a series of adventures with John and his mother, Sarah, trying to escape the Terminators while preventing Skynet (the supercomputer that will rule the world) from being built, all the while trying to teach Cameron, the teenage girl Terminator, how to be more human.
If that seems like a lot to pack into a series, in practice it really never seemed to be so. Most of the episodes involved them trying to track down a piece of technology that could lead to Skynet, and trying to neutralize it, all the while dodging Terminator models pursuing them.
The Terminator models, by the way, were like the original Arnold models – human skin over a cyborg exoskeleton. There were no T-1000 models to be found. And while that may seem disappointing to some, I actually appreciated it. The T-1000 from Terminator 2 was cool as all hell when I was in high school, but it strikes me as a hard concept to sustain in a television series. Plus I like the old-school visceral feel to the older model Terminators – the metal gleaming through torn skin effect. It just works better for me.
While the series was decent, it never really pushed past good into great. The “mission of the week” plotlines became a bit monotonous and the relationships between the characters, particularly John and his mother, became stale. The most interesting moments, in my opinion, were those where we had a glimpse into the future world and how that interacted with the past. Zooming out, as it were, to get a sense of the bigger picture. That engaged me. It even benefitted, strangely enough, from the addition to the cast of Brian Austin Green, playing the brother of Kyle Reese (the freedom fighter from the future in the first Terminator movie).
Two weeks ago, the second season of the Sarah Connor Chronicles premiered on Fox, picking up after a Season One Finale cliffhanger. And it was a strong episode. For my money clearly the best episode of the series so far. Yes, there were a few logical dips in the episode, but they managed to create a threat that transcended the usual Terminator threats and also touched on a thread that will no doubt carry through the season and perhaps the series as well – the redefinition of the relationship between John and Sarah. We've been told time and again how John is going to be instrumental to the human race, how he alone can lead them against the machines. We've finally started to get a sense of this, a glimpse of the leader that he will be, a whiff of the iron core that is developing inside of him. That, for me, was a gratifying moment.
And while I will do my best to avoid spoilers in this article, we also see a Terminator model that's new to the series. It adds another dimension and element to the show.
Since the premiere, the second episode of the season has aired, and I have to say that after the quality of the opener, it was a disappointment. There were some redeeming elements to be sure, a few new elements introduced into the show that will no doubt come to bear later on (a girlfriend for John, a new subplot for Sarah), but once again the show devolved into a “mission of the week” story and this one just lacked anything interesting at all. Even during the climax of the show, when our heroes are in the middle of danger, I had no stake in what was happening, there was no tension despite all the flashing lights and klaxons.
So far it's difficult to tell where this season of the Sarah Connor Chronicles is going to go. After a strong start, it has fallen back to the levels of its previous mediocrity. Part of that, though is the fault of the concept itself. In the original movie, the concept makes sense of a sort. A killing machine is sent back in time to kill the mother of their biggest enemy. That enemy (John Connor) sends back a human to try to save her. In T2, the formula is repeated, only the threat escalated. The killing machine is more advanced. So the future Connor sends back a repurposed old-school terminator to help save himself.
You could make the case that in the first two movies, the time travel was something that wasn't easy to do. Otherwise, why not send a cadre of terminators back in time, at various points in Connor's history, to attempt to kill him? If you're Connor, why not send an army back to protect him and his mother. Or stop Skynet or whatever. These possibilities are played with in the television show, but not satisfactorily. Since the beginning of the series, time travel has been used many times. We've seen a slew of terminators, and at least a handful of resistance fighters. What they've failed to do, though, is provide an explanation. If time travel is so easy to do and can be done at the drop of a hat, why not send someone back to kill Sarah's parents? Why not send someone back to the time of either movie to double up the attempts. And how is it that one man, alone, makes that much of a difference.
I realize this is a television show and we must accept certain things, but all of this could be easily explained with just a few simple lines – time travel is dangerous, mess with too much and the machines could easily prevent their own future. Time travel is expensive for both sides – therefore carefully calculated jumps must be made. Make it into a time-spanning chess game, and then I can buy into it. Right now it seems too haphazard. Too easily used for plot devices – like transporter accidents in Star Trek.
At its heart, Sarah Connor Chronicles takes the ideas introduced in the Terminator movies and plays with them, giving us a better look at the lives of the mother and son team on the run. What it hasn't done yet, in my opinion, is to give us a better idea of why these two are important and what the greater picture is.
UPDATE: After viewing the third episode of the season, it appears that there is some promise yet in the show. What excelled in this last episode was that they made the villain more than just another machine this time. Additionally, they raised the stakes. Emotional stakes. In this episode there were consequences to the actions the characters took. And most of all, my favorite part, was that they showed us a glimpse of what differs between John and his mother. His mother is hard and tough and strong and capable, but she has sacrificed her emotions and her empathy and her ability to relate to other people, for her son. But John has this, and indeed needs this if he is to become the leader that he is supposed to be. If they stick to this track, I think that this season could be where the show becomes great.
Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles Season One is available on DVD and the second season is available on iTunes and Amazon.com if you need to catch up.
Posted by Rajan at 01:20 PM
February 27, 2007
NYCC: Battlestar Galactica Panel Video
Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Read the live blog of the Battlestar Galactica panel.
Discuss this article in our forum.
Posted by YourMomsBasement at 12:00 PM
February 24, 2007
NYCC: SciFi Presents: Battlestar Galactica
We're going to have some video, too, for this panel.
Saw Hayden Panettiere being escorted around by stormtroopers and apologizing to the crowd for the commotion.
Yesterday SciFi/Virgin Comics announced.
Five titles. Global ambitions. Unique properties. September launch. Road testing concepts. Comic fans will be the taste testers for bringing concepts to other media.
Kevin Smith moderating.
VP of marketing at Sci Fi. James Callis and Tricia Helfer.
Clip reel shown.
Boy fraks girl. Boy inadvertently ends world.
Classic love story.
Smith asks how someone gets into marketing.
Smith's Star Wars pen pal was in Alberta Canada, asks Helfer if she knew him.
Asks about the Six/Xena threesome. If he could also nail Scully, that would be the trifecta.
Helfer had been acting for a year before BSG. Drawn to script.
Almos very "passionate". Smith asks if that's code for being an asshole.
Callis had done Bridget Jones. At first he was acting almost in his own show with little interaction with rest of cast. Wasn't until he saw it all together that he saw how "amazing" it was.
Was there ever a moments hesitation about doing sci fi? Callis says he said are you f-ing kidding me when first approached about part. Didn't "get it", until he was auditioning with Helfer. Helfer's dad was a Battlestar fan.
Callis wanted to be very different from original, not a creep in a toga by a laptop.
Togas in season four.
Helfer had no prior character reference.
Callis says writers were brilliant in giving character his foil in Six. Original Baltar sold out humanity for a "bathrobe". New Baltar's motivations more complex.
How to play "Six"? Was originally a colder character. How does she walk, talk, sit?
Six's Jiminy Cricket relationship with Baltar? What was it like when character interaction changed when Six was shown to have a Baltar in her head? Didn't work at first. Had to re-figure out how they moved around each other. Had to do it slightly differently. Writers will be getting back to it. Helfer was happy that Callis would also see what it was like to be outside a scene while in a scene. First time they did it, Callis missed his line, forgetting he was in the scene, just watching the other actors.
Helfer loves challenge of playing multiple versions of same character.
When they're on a Basestar and have their hands in some shit... what is that shit? Sometimes nothing. Sometimes water. Smith expects them to say "you're soaking in it."
Does BSG open doors in the industry? Few in industry watch the show. Callis went to meeting with Disney. They thought he was in Stargate and was cancelled. Callis does great, funny American accents.
There's a snobbery in the industry against sci-fi. But outside the industry, it's massive. It's going to last in people's minds long after show is over.
Why the move to Sunday? Wanted to bring in new people. Ratings up 10%. The best show not many people are watching.
Won a Peabody.
DVD movie, then air on SciFi. Side stories to tell.
Trial coming up, within three episodes.
Special effects when Battlestar Galactica jumped into atmosphere. Callis was impressed by scenes of ships on Caprica during day. Firefly fan spoke up about their show.
Never want to come up against a browncoat. These cats celebrate a show not even on the air anymore. Helfer used to date Nathan Fillion.
There are rebel troopers "guarding" the stage...
Q&A:
Spoilers? Starbuck off the credits? Can't say.
Spin off Caprica still being worked on.
Baltar best character ever in history of any media? Will he be the eventual saviour off all humanity? He may not be. But you can't quite put your finger on what he's about.
On a Star Trek vs. BSG panel and Star Trek person said that dark as it is the characters on BSG keep their hope and ultimately that's what the show is about. Callis doubts Baltar can redeem himself.
How do you play Baltar in high emotion scenes? Take some time by yourself. Get head into space where you believe it yourself so you can project it to the camera.
Baltar's beard? Can we have an unkempt tv character? Baltar no longer cares about his appearance, it's emblematic of his state of mind.
Smith loses a bet when the marketing guy gets a question about repeats of Hollow Man. Are they limiting the exposure of the show by not re-running it constantly? Marketing guy says that's not accurate, schedule is on SciFi.com. Smith tells questioner he was "fucking Pwned!"
Any other original actors coming up? Dirk Benedict will play Baltar's Mini-Me. Anything possible. Smith says no, because Lorne Greene is dead.
Helfer have any concerns playing such a sexual character? No worries from miniseries due to the character's intelligence being so central.
Smith compliments them again to end it. Much clapping of hands.
Posted by YourMomsBasement at 11:00 AM
January 17, 2007
Heroes Spoilers Revealed!
Once again, YMB's team of investigative infotainment reporters have managed to discover spoilers for a super-popular TV show, this time the second half of the first season of NBC's big, hit TV show Heroes...
Budget concerns have forced the show to abandon its plan to have Hiro fight a dinosaur armed only with a samurai sword. At first, they planned to replace that fight with him fighting a crocodile, but then that was deemed to dangerous. Instead, he will fight Bindi Irwin, the eight year-old daughter of the Crocodile Hunter, in a crossover promotion with Discovery Kids.
Hiro is not expected to survive the encounter.
The heroes will be thrown for a loop when painter of the future Isaac, being a tempermental druggie artist, decides to change mediums, causing massive delays in the heroes being able to get the information they need from his visions.
The problem?
He takes up sculpting.
In marble.
With a chisel.
Heroes will start to suffer from the same NBC stunt casting that ultimately hurt ER and Will and Grace. When Linderman is finally revealed he will be played by none other than 80s sitcom star Bronson Pinchot. A production assistant told us: "It seemed like a good idea at the time. Get Balki for the part, have him do a funny accent. Give the show a little humor injection. But now that we're filming it... damn, was this ever a mistake. We should have gotten Cousin Larry."
Catchphrases, catchphrases, catchphrases! Along with the now famous "Save the Cheerleader, Save the World", and "Are You On the List?", expect your favorite Heroes characters to spout out "Bring it On!", "Imma Blow Up Your Face!", and "You Want to Stick That Where?"
The show's creators will continue their practice of subtley naming characters as Hiro meets new heroes "Sue Permann", "Juss Tisse", "Goodguy McSaint", and villainess "Eve Ill".
Ali Larter will take her clothes off in an upcoming episode. Due to the magic of "strategically-placed shadows" and "carefully-situated foreground objects"... you're still not gonna see anything.
Hiro will disappear into the past again. This time, when he comes back, he will return as a skilled swordsman, a perfect speaker of English, and lead singer of Wyld Stallyns.
Due to a busy schedule at DC, artist Tim Sale will no longer be able to provide the actual art for Isaac's in-story comic book. He will be replaced by comic book bad boy Pat Lee. The change in the look of the art will be explained within the context of the show by having Isaac suffer a stroke.
Our infotainment reporters last brought you spoilers for season three of "LOST."
Discuss this article in our forum.
Posted by YourMomsBasement at 08:30 AM
September 20, 2006
SNL RANKINGS
by Pete Goodrich
Thanks to Jesse Farrell, Casey Ontiveros, Wikipedia, and http://snltranscripts.jt.org/ for information and input.
As a youth, I got hooked on Saturday Night Live. I don't think that I am unique in this, I think most people of my generation would have been in the same boat: old enough that we were allowed to stay up late enough for SNL, not old enough to have a saturday curfew past 11 PM. I was lucky enough to 'come of age' right at one of the highest points of SNL's history: the last 80's/early 90's period, with Phil Hartman, Jon Lovitz, Dana Carvey, and Mike Myers and such all in their primes.
Through the magic of basic cable, I also got tuned into the reruns that seemed to always be running on Comedy Central. The video stores had collections of the best of Dan Aykroyd, Chevy Chase, and John Belushi. This foundation of SNL affection in my youth continued up through...well now. There was the dark age in 1994-95 where the cast on paper was incredibly solid, but the results were all but garbage. But that's kind of the nature of the show. The original Not Ready For Prime Time Players were followed by a terrible cast in 1980-1981, and my revered cast of the late 80's/early 90's was similarly followed by a...well like I said, the cast was solid but the shows were pretty suck.
I don't go out of my way for the show like I once did, but I always keep an eye on it in one fashion or another. And I always pay special attention to those from the cast. Back in the day the funniest movies out there were by guys like Aykroyd and Belushi, Murray, Eddie Murphy, Billy Crystal, Martin Short. And the SNL to movie thing got big with my generation, with "Wayne's World" hitting big when I was in high school. Oh how I loved "Wayne's World".
But then again, there was...well I once saw a movie called "Feds." A colossally unfunny movie, I only watched because it was on for free (well, HBO) and starred Rebecca DeMornay who most everyone will remember as the hot chick from "Risky Business." Co-starring with her was a woman named Mary Gross, who was also unfunny. Imagine my surprise when I learned that Mary Gross was a former SNL cast member. Or when I learned that Gilbert Gottfried had been on the show as well. And when Seinfeld got big, I was distinctly surprised to learn that Elaine had been on SNL as well, the same time as Gottfried no less!
What the hell?! How can so much good and so much mediocre come from the same source? This is the question that led me to this project here. Through the sterling resources of Wikipedia and my own memories of the show both watched at the time and through many, many hours of reruns I've run down the entire cast list of SNL. No 'featured players' are included unless they got the promotion to regular cast member. And I left out the writers unless they were also performers as well, as funny as Conan O'Brien and Robert Smigel are they do not fit the same mold as the others.
This is my own interpretation of the shows cast, not yours. I fully expect people to disagree with some of these choices, and thats fine. We all see talent in our own ways. But I think most everyone will agree with how I've laid things out here for right now, certainly as far as who's a big star and who's lucky to get a spot on VH-1's "I Really Love the 90's!"
Some of the entries have been broken up with '+', '-', or '?' That's to show where I think they're on the way up, down, or questionable. And aside from a couple brief comments, I'm leaving out the deceased cast members. I just don't want to speak ill of the dead. But you know who's legit, and who is not.
John Belushi (October 11, 1975–1979)
Gilda Radner (October 11, 1975–1980)
Charles Rocket (1980–1981)
Footnote for Mr. Rocket: the first SNL cast member to swear on live TV. Also the first cast member to be fired for swearing on live TV.
Danitra Vance (1985–1986)
Phil Hartman (1986–1994)
My own personal #1 ever SNL cast member. Phil could and did do it all, and it's a shame that he passed in the manner he did.
Chris Farley (1990–1995)
A Class:
These are the legit stars only. I don't think I need to really break it down more than that, do I?
A Bill Murray (1976–1980)
OSCAR NOMINATED Bill Murray. Yes, he had a couple dead spots in his earlier career, but you cannot deny that he is the head of the class when it comes to SNL alumni.
A Eddie Murphy (1980–1984)
Ahh, Eddie. The first big star to break out of SNL after the original cast. The first SNL star to have to reinvent himself too.
A Mike Myers (1988–1995)
On a personal note, I really want him to return to the more bizarre, absurd type of film like "So I Married an Axe Murderer" as opposed to "Austin Powers 4: More Dumb Catchphrases."
A Chris Rock (1990–1993)
How can such a funny guy make so many weak movies? But still: he's Chris Rock. He's fucking funny, and between his stand up and his HBO show he's doing just fine.
A- Rob Schneider (1990–1994)
He gets the minus because...well hey. He can headline a movie...that will be universally panned by the critics, and general public. His films will always gross a decent of money...because lots of people smoke pot nowadays. Certainly for the purpose of these rankings he does count as A-list talent, but come on now. It's Rob frigging Schneider.
A Adam Sandler (1990–1995)
He will put asses in the theater seats. That said, I don't know a single person in the world who actually saw "Spanglish."
A? Will Ferrell (1995–2002)
Time will tell. He's doing very well right now (and deservedly so) but who knows what the future may hold? Could be a "Lost in Translation" role for him, could be "Doctor Detroit". I'm not quite 100% sure that he's going to keep doing as well as he has. But then again he's the millionaire actor and I'm just a schmuck on a website.
B Class:
Honored alumni who excelled in their particular casts, yet somehow never made it to that next step. No shame in this, but they will forever be known for what they did on SNL, not for what came after, or before. Also a couple of respected alums who don't quite fit in the other categories, or (through author bias) just deserve to be held up a little higher.
B Dan Aykroyd (1975–1979)
Once, a huge star. Now: He was in that Britney Spears movie. He had a terrible sitcom or two. I won't take this too far, but man...his star has faded.
B Jane Curtin (1975–1980)
Some TV work in the 80's and 90's ("3rd Rock From the Sun" was a decent show, I think) tho I haven't seen her do anything since in quite some time.
B Dennis Miller (1985–1991)
It bothers me that he went so right wing.
B Jan Hooks (1986–1991)
A truly solid performer on the show. I don't know that she had 'it,' which is why I figure she never made the jump to stardom beyond SNL. I reserve the right to authorial bias to put her up here.
B? Dana Carvey (1986–1993)
Ol' Dana here could have (and some say should have) been the next Big Thing to come out of SNL, but the poor guy got sidetracked by a botched heart surgery in 1997 which slowed him up huge, and the guy never got his momentum back. I hope he does in time.
B- Kevin Nealon (1986–1995)
Hes been quiet for awhile (I remember he hosted this late night 'are UFOs real?' catbox of a show for awhile) but is now on that Weeds show that everybody seems to like, and doing well. His tenure on the show alone shots him up to the B list, not unlike our friend... B+/- Tim Meadows (1990–2000) He did a decade on SNL. He did get his "The Ladies Man" movie done, but I saw it and the fact that it did not lead him to new heights in Hollywood...well, yeah. The SNL spinoff machine does not always lead to big fat "Blues Brothers" money. See "Roxbury, a Night at the." I wish him well, but if he never made it farther than a guest spot in a Sandler movie I can hardly say I'd be surprised.
B Ana Gasteyer (1996–2002)
Left the show to be a mom. Good for her. Funny lady.
C Class:
Emerging movie stars/Steady workers: these folks did well on SNL -or were at least in a lot of skits and thusly became recognizeable names in the showbiz. Might not like some of 'em, but we have to acknowledge their success. Or at least their success in keeping regular jobs. Some of them have failed, and spectacularly. Crap sitcoms, terrible feature films, they run the gamut of dubious career choices. This one is a bit of a mixed bag, I admit.
C Chevy Chase (1975–1976)
You do not deserve the good will we gave Aykroyd up above. I saw Snow Day. And I remember the talk show.
C- Joe Piscopo (1980–1984)
You're LUCKY you made it this high. "Dead Heat"... "Wise Guys"... You're LUCKY. But you cannot deny that Joe Piscopo is still a recognizeable name.
C Rich Hall (1984–1985)
He's the 'Sniglet' guy. Listed here simply because he's the reason why I know the name of the plastic tip on the end of a shelace. (Aglets.)
C Jon Lovitz (1985–1990)
Listed with LOVE, Jon. I loved the Critic. But you never should have tried to follow poor Phil Hartman on "NewsRadio". But hey, you had to work. Respect. But there is no excuse for "Mom and Dad Save the World."
C David Spade (1990–1996)
A couple failed sitcoms, a couple weak movies, and one Comedy Central show that may or may not still be on the air. Dude, you WISH you were Rob Schneider. And that my friend...is pathetic.
C Norm MacDonald (1993–1998)
A pair of lukewarm films, and a tanked sitcom. But you're getting another chance thanks to Comedy Central. So you're right here.
C Molly Shannon (1994–2001)
Just starting out in the world of movies. Best of luck to you. You make a great 'best friend to female lead.' But the "Superstar" movie really revealed your limitations, no?
C Colin Quinn (1995–2000)
I think you're funny. I liked your Update. I am alone in this.
C- Chris Kattan (1995–2003)
Corky fucking Romano. You're a poor man's Andy Dick, and Andy Dick is not fucking funny.
C+ David Koechner (1995–1996)
Dude was in "Anchorman". AND "Snakes on a Plane". His star doth rise!
C? Tracy Morgan (1996–2003)
You had your failed sitcom, and you've had a couple unfunny cameos in some random movies. But you get to star in the new Tina Fey produced show on NBC, so your star is on the rise...unless the show tanks, and then you try the sitcom thing again. Only this time on FOX. And sitcoms do so well on FOX, don't they? Don't they?
C? Jimmy Fallon
I fucking hate this grinning muppet, but even I have to acknowledge that the ladies, they seem to love him. Only a couple movies out the gate (one tanked, the Red Sox one did okay I believe) and one Coke commercial makes it tough to accurately gauge where he's going to go. But oh, I do hope it's towards the bottom.
C Horatio Sanz (1998—2006)
I just learned that he left the show. Whenever some fool in Hollywood goes for a retarded remake of "Cheers," look for Sanz to play a Hispanic Norm for one painful season.
C? Rachel Dratch (1999–2006)
I wish her nothing but the best. Dude! She's frigging funny.
C? Tina Fey (2000—2006)
I salute you for taking the leap out of your comfort zone and trying for a sitcom. I have no faith in your sitcom. Fare thee well!
* Class:
Star Class! These folks became stars independent of their time on SNL, to the point that when its brought up that they used to be on the cast, it's a pleasant surprise. Also included here are the folks who had careers before they joined the cast, and their time on the show did more for the show as a whole than it did for their individual careers.
* Gilbert Gottfried (1980–1981)
Debate this one all you want. I think the guy's funny. ...in small doses. AFLAC!
* Christine Ebersole (1981–1982)
I never heard of her either, but apparently she's won a Tony award, and has done very well on Broadway. Point to you, Miss Ebersole. Way to put your terrible, terrible season behind you.
* Julia Louis-Dreyfus (1982–1985)
Where a guy like Jon Lovitz will always be remembeed as 'the guy who used to be hilarious on SNL,' Julia Louis-Dreyfus will always be remembered as Elaine. But she did start on SNL!
*- Jim Belushi (1983–1985)
Apparently old people like that show of his on ABC. Me, I liked him in "The Principal." But I have terrible taste.
* Harry Shearer (1979–1980) & (1984–1985)
* Billy Crystal (1984–1985)
* Christopher Guest (1984–1985)
* Martin Short (1984–1985)
The last four names are four of the funniest people ever. SNL was lucky to have had them all in the same place for the year that they did. I long for a Best of 84-85 collection.
* Joan Cusack (1985–1986)
Always dependable.
* Robert Downey Jr. (1985–1986)
* Anthony Michael Hall (1985–1986)
I always found it to be pretty odd that they hired these two guys for the show in the midst of their Brat Packery.
* Randy Quaid (1985–1986)
You know who's awesome? Randy fucking Quaid, that's who's awesome.
* Michael McKean (1993–1995)
Was he Lenny Or Squiggy?
* Chris Elliott (1994–1995)
* Janeane Garofalo (1994–1995)
There will never be a Best Of for this cast. Both of them were totally wasted. Well, that might be revisionist history talking here. I remember these two from SNL, and I remember them not being funny.
* Mark McKinney (1994–1997)
I freely admit to a massive amount of authorial bias towards this cast member. But then again as much as I love/d SNL, I love the "Kids in the Hall" ten times more.
F Class:
Failed stars: those who left and went nowhere. Or those who just weren't asked to come back. It happens. You get your chance to be on the big stage, and sometimes it never pans out.
F Garrett Morris (1975–1980)
F Laraine Newman (1975–1980)
I was reluctant to put any of the original cast members on this part of the list, just out of respect for them being the originals. But we must be honest.
F Denny Dillon (1980–1981)
If I remember correctly she specialized in playing annoying characters. Post-SNL she was on that HBO sitcom "Dream On" playing the annoying secretary. A lateral move!
F Gail Matthius (1980–1981)
F Ann Risley (1980–1981)
No idea who these people are.
F Tony Rosato (1980–1982)
After SNL he was the voice of Luigi on the "Nintendo Power Hour". More interesting than his career is that Luigi's last name was 'Mario.' Which makes Mario, 'Mario Mario.' Very clever, Nintendo.
F Robin Duke (1980–1984)
I remember one of her recurring skits was playing part of a whiny married couple with Joe Piscopo, called 'The Whiners.' Yes, it was just as good as it sounds.
F Tim Kazurinsky (1980–1984)
Sweetchuck from the Police Academy movies. The years are misleading, I think he spent more time as a writer than as an actual featured performer.
F Mary Gross (1981–1985)
She was on the show.
F Brad Hall (1982–1984)
Fun fact: He married Julia Louis-Dreyfus.
Notice something about the above group? Tha majority of them didn't make it past 1981. And I've seen some of those reruns on Comedy Central from back in the day, and these episodes were in fact godawful. Some of these folks managed to make it through another season or so, but on the whole they are the forgotten castmembers. I don't even think they get invites back to the show anniversaries.
F Gary Kroeger (1982–1985)
I remember you only because you hosted this one late night stand-up show back in the day, that was ironically on opposite SNL. Also, you were on Night Court once.
F Pamela Stephenson (1984–1985)
She was a British lady, and I think the only cast member to ever hail from the UK.
F Terry Sweeney (1985–1986)
Did a hell of a Nancy Reagan impression?
F Nora Dunn (1985–1990)
Stood out when she was on the show for refusing to do the show when Andrew Dice Clay was hosting. ...played the mom in the (underrated) cable movie "The Hebrew Hammer." Not much else to add here.
F Victoria Jackson (1986–1992)
Celebrity Fit Club people! The dictionary definition of 'show for has-beens!' And hell, I hated her on SNL when she was on the cast...
F Julia Sweeney (1990–1994)
I heard she had a Broadway show based on her battle with cancer, so I felt bad about putting her down here. But then I remembered "It's Pat! The Movie" and my hatred was reborn.
F Siobhan Fallon (1991–1992)
No idea.
F Melanie Hutsell (1991–1994)
Marsha Marsha Marsha! Marsha Marsha Marsha! Marsha Marsha Marsha!
F Ellen Cleghorne (1991–1995)
I remember she had one of the very first (failed) sitcoms on the (failed) WB network.
F Jay Mohr (1993–1995)
Had a FOX sitcom. A couple movie roles. Wrote a book about SNL that I never read. Largely forgotten.
F Laura Kightlinger (1994–1995)
I wanted to give her a bit of a pass because she was in the original Tenacious D episodes. But lets face it: Laura Kight-what?
F Nancy Walls (1995–1996)
Was on the Daily Show for a bit, and has had a couple cameos on the NBC version of the Office.
F Jim Breuer (1995–1998)
His best role ever was in Half Baked, which says a lot.
F Cheri Oteri (1995–2000)
I never liked her. It pleases me to know that she is reduced to hosting clip shows on the E! network.
F Jeff Richards (2001–2004)
Your only memorable character was 'Drunk Girl,' and in that role you made every other comedian that ever did drag in the entire history of comedy look 3 times funnier. Repetition does not make it funny.
...and none of this is etched in stone. If you'd asked me about Bill Murray back when he was costarring with an elephant, I don't think I'd have been so charitable. Any one of these folks is one hit or one miss away from rising up in the standings. Look at Eddie Murphy, he wasn't doing a good damn thing for years, until he reinvented himself as the funny family comedian.
No, this listing is nothing carved in stone. But it is a pretty good indicator of where people stand in their post SNL careers. I think it's pretty safe to say that folks like Robin Duke and Tony Rosato's careers are pretty much what they are: over. But prove me wrong Hollywood!
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Posted by YourMomsBasement at 08:00 AM
August 22, 2006
LOST Season Three Spoilers Revealed!
By the YMB Staff.
YMB's crack reporters were able to get LOST executive produce Damon Lindeloff talking by plying him with beers at a recent ABC television event.
We learned to things. First, one cheap domestic beer buys you lot of time with Mr. Lindeloff. And second, we now know MAJOR SPOILERS for LOST's third season.
Which we are happy to provide you with now (don't say we never got you nothin'):
ITEM!: Harold "Michael" Perrineau will in fact be returning for season 3, but in flashbacks only. These will be extra footage of his quest for Walt that took place throughout Season 2. By contract, he must shout "He's my boy!", "Walt!", or "I'm his father!" once in each scene he's featured in.
"OZ IS TEARING ME APART!"
ITEM!: Executives at ABC still reeling from Nipplegate (The Jackson/Timberlake Super Bowl incident) are feeling skittish about the upcoming episode that focuses on Vincent the Magical Dog. While they are confident that the canine-centric episode will draw the younger viewers, they are afraid of a viewer backlash to the twenty-three minutes that are devoted to Vincent licking himself.
Notice: That scene will last for twenty-three minutes.
"YOU'D DO IT TOO."
ITEM!: In Libby news, Cynthia Watros' character will continue to make more appearances dead than she did alive. Look for her to appear as a patient of Jack's father, to share a jail cell with a fugitive Kate for drunk driving, as a groupie backstage at a Driveshaft show, passing the hand towels to Sun in a South Korean bathroom; and then walking through a door held by Jin, riding the bus that drove past Michael just seconds after he was struck by the car, and in a Marrakesh opium den owned and operated by one Mr. Eko. She will receive no dialogue.
As the mysterious "Others" have taken Jack, Sawyer, and Kate hostage and the explosion at the hatch have led to the disappearances of Mr Eko and John Locke, look for a new Lostaway to step up as leader of the 'tribe.' Marine biologist in training Phil Reinhardt (played by Ted "Soap, Blossom" Wass) tries to assert himself as the new leader of the group, meeting conflict with Sayid and Charlie.
After a three episode run (including flashbacks where we learn his reasons for dropping out of marine biology school- his tuition ran out!) detailing this strife, he is eventually ousted from the Lostaway camp once it is revealed that he had served up the mummified corpses of "Adam and Eve" (mysterious mummies found in the grotto in Season 1) as boar jerky. Will he join the mysterious "Others?" That friends, is a question for Lost Season 5!
"I work for food! This show's
earned me thirty turkeys!"
ITEM!: The mysterious secret of the Black Rock is finally revealed! A flashback set in the 1600's (filmed with the assistance of Gore Verbinski on the set of Pirates of the Carribbean 2: The Black Pearl- synergy!) will detail the mysterious pull of the mysterious island as the Portugese slave ship The Black Rock is mysteriously shipwrecked on the mysterious island when they follow a mysterious signal thought to be the mysterious, mythological Siren...that is actually the voice of the mysterious Danielle Rousseau, her voice mysteriously transmitted back from the 21st century to the 16th! Mysterious!
ITEM!: Product Placement! Season 3 of LOST will feature what producers are hoping to be a subtle change to viewers, namely the introduciton of product placement to the mysterious island. Although the hatch is no more, the mysterious airdrops will continue from the Dharma Corporation...only this season will see that Dharma has upgraded from it's own generic products! Borderline insane Frenchwoman/hermit Danielle Rousseau will be able to shave her armpits with the new Gillette Venus razors for women! Will Hurley be able to control his eating disorder when faced with a rainstorm...of Cocoa Puffs? He's cuckoo for them! And sadly, John Locke will find himself once again paralyzed when struck by an airborne can of Chef Boyardee Pasta Roni.
The identity of the 'Great Man' as mentioned by the Others will be revealed...and he is *not* the man who called himself Henry Gale. The real identity of the mysterious figure behind the Others? Funnyman Tim Allen, reprising his role as "Tim 'The Tool Man' Taylor" from the 1990's hit TV program "Home Improvement. ABC is hoping he can bring his own special brand of ratings magic back to the network with this very special role. Our reporter is betting...he can.
"Let me in there Wilson, I'll get that hatch open
with a little manly ability. *moronic grunting*"
ITEM!: ABC will be taking bigger and bolder risks than ever before with Season 3- and NOT with the lifes of the Lostaways! This season will feature more corporate synergy than ever before. Hurley will hallucinate that he is on the hit ABC reality program "Dancing With the Stars," in a hilarious twist Sawyer will reveal his secret obsession with 'Desperate Housewives," and more of the tragic past between long-lost lovers Desmond and Penelope will be revealed in a special episode, shot entirely at the Epcot Center.
I don't think anybody actually goes to this place.
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Posted by YourMomsBasement at 08:30 AM