A tricks of Turning Pro Expose by
By Gary Walters

So DC has had to recall copies of their trashy All Star Batman and Robin due to their black-colored censor bars not actually covering up the curse words Frank Miller littered around his script. Some even uttered by minors!

Now, in my professional comic work (see the upcoming "Even Steven" and the future-planned "Monster Works" and the just thought of as I was typing this "Patriot Robot.") I would never reduce myself to cursing. It lowers the intelligence of me and my audience. I get that Frank Miller likes it. A lot. I mean, he loves it sooooooooo much. But it's not for me. What I want to address in this column by way of Miller's vulgarity is a greater vulgarity hidden in plain sight in comics. The nudity.

Like Miller and his inability to cover up his cursing with black boxes, comic creators have been using swatches of color to cover up their nudie perv fantasies for decades.

Take this cover of New Avengers number 14 by Frank Cho.

Looks like a regular superheroine in a tight fitting costume, right? But remove the colors from the art and you get this:

A naked woman. Covered in oil, I think. Baby oil. Meant to tittilate and excite!

Most costumes work that way! Take away the colors and everyone looks naked! All the time! Even the dudes! And their all rolling all over and grabbing each other!

If you're color-blind, comics must look like a big 24-hour sex orgy.

And if you're reading a Frank Miller comic, there's also the cursing! Naked superhero sex cursing! Sold to children! Outrageous! Don't let the big comic media elites get away with their four colored corruption of America! Stand up for yourselfes and morals! Take back the comic book spinner rack! For the children! USA! USA! USA!

Gary last blogged for YMB back in April...